Tower:21: Saying Goodbye

What would I say to the people that are still with him? Hmmm… I don’t think there’s anything I could tell them that they would care to hear. Remember that I was where you are now. I’m very proud of your devotion, even though I feel it’s misplaced. But really GO for it. If you’re going to be there, absolutely dive into YOUR experience. It’s the only part that is real. And know that, even though NOT being in the group seems tremendously scary, your path may lead you in that direction one day. When that happens… TRUST. Grace knows what it’s doing. Your journey will continue no matter what. We were all part of this thing we created, striving to be more than our mediocre-best. We were all looking for some way to do that. I truly hope you find that. However, the way to that has never been through turning a blind eye or refusing to look at something. So, hold Angelo accountable for his actions. Because now you know. So you too are accountable. You share the karma of anything that happens from this point forward.

Those people that don’t feel that type of drive, when they meet Angelo, probably won’t get it. They might see some ridiculous clown. I don’t think they would believe what he has going on there. That he is surrounded by so many people that are so afraid of losing his love. As a group, we can come across quirky or dumb, or scary, or tremendously organized. The Buddha Field has all those elements. But basically, we were regular people that were looking for something more in our lives -- with a pure yearning -- and we just fell into this situation.

Was I brainwashed? Absolutely. I happen to think everyone is brainwashed though. So it’s not a big deal. I think it’s important that you CHOOSE the brainwashing that you want though instead of having it thrust on you. But, yes, I did some things and made some choices that I would never have done if I had been in my “right” mind. But I wasn’t. I side-stepped the responsibility for having to make any choices in my life and just followed. Ultimately, it has led me to a place that I enjoy so I’m tremendously grateful for that experience. Would I have gotten here anyway? Maybe. There’s no way to know that. Would I have chosen differently on most things with the awareness that I have now? Absolutely.

Being one of “The Severed,” I never got to say goodbye to Angelo. I don’t feel unresolved with him though. If I had an opportunity to say something to him it would be: Thank you for helping me on my journey. Even though I wasn’t really doing the program you came up with, I definitely used you as part of my own path. My experience with you seems to have been unique. And though I can’t relate to a lot of what I’ve heard from other people, it is obvious that you have left a lot of damage in your wake. You’ve got to think about what you’re doing. Your program doesn’t actually work (as far as making people free) and you’re hurting people along the way. People that you care about. Hurting them in the worst way because you linked yourself with God so strongly with them that, in trying to throw you out of their hearts, they are trying to throw out God as well. You do NOT want that karma. Just for yourself… get some help with your psychological issues or stop taking on the role of leader for people. Take responsibility for everything you have created in your life as well as the lives of others.